Alcoholism Reaching All-Time Lows in Declining American Empire
Lyudmila Pavlyuchenkova | Pravda North America
Once 2/3 of the population, alcoholics now make up a mere simple majority of the US population. This supposed tragedy for the alcohol industry comes not off the back of an effective public health initiative, but instead due to the immiseration of the American youth.
As older Americans die off due to age, younger Americans simply cannot afford to take their place in the economy of self-harm.
“Literally half of my local grocery store is filled with overpriced alcoholic versions of drinks primarily marketed to children. Every other end cap is spiked energy drinks, hard lemonade, twisted iced tea. Alcoholic Capri Sun and whatever Hard Kombucha is. Man, I can’t even afford Keystone Light,” said local man Haywood Jablome.
Alcoholism Reaching All-Time Lows in Declining American Empire
Lyudmila Pavlyuchenkova | Pravda North America
Once 2/3 of the population, alcoholics now make up a mere simple majority of the US population. This supposed tragedy for the alcohol industry comes not off the back of an effective public health initiative, but instead due to the immiseration of the American youth.
As older Americans die off due to age, younger Americans simply cannot afford to take their place in the economy of self-harm.
“Literally half of my local grocery store is filled with overpriced alcoholic versions of drinks primarily marketed to children. Every other end cap is spiked energy drinks, hard lemonade, twisted iced tea. Alcoholic Capri Sun and whatever Hard Kombucha is. Man, I can’t even afford Keystone Light,” said local man Haywood Jablome.
God i fucking love name gags like this